Love My Boyfriend, But Hate His Hobbies – How To Deal With It
A girl doesn’t have to enjoy the same things her boyfriend does, but what should a girl do if she absolutely hates his hobbies?
Men and women have very different interpretations of the phrase “spending quality time together.” For women, it’s doing something fun for both of you and having some sort of interaction while performing the activity; however, men see it differently.
For them, the mere fact that you’re together already means a lot, so it doesn’t matter if he’s doing his own thing and you’re doing yours, as long as you’re together, it’s alright.
For women, watching your boyfriend play video games all day doesn’t really qualify as quality time, but it happens – a lot. Most women don’t complain at first, but after a while it can get a bit tiresome watching your boyfriend spend the whole night playing poker with his friends when he was just playing an online RPG game with them on the computer the whole day yesterday.
Nobody is saying that guys shouldn’t get a hobby, but then when a man spends too much time, and sometimes even money, on a hobby, their girlfriends feel alienated and they end up hating what used to be just a harmless hobby.
Before the relationship goes sour leads to an ugly breakup, there are some ways to maintain a certain balance in the relationship while allowing both parties to live the lives they want.
How Should a Girl Deal With Her Boyfriend’s Obsessions – err, I mean Hobbies?
Women can complain about this almost obsessive behavior to their boyfriends all they want, but nagging won’t help at all. After all, he doesn’t stop you from spending all your money when you go shopping, and he sometimes even agrees to come with and carry your shopping bags for you.
The bottom line is that your boyfriend won’t give up his hobbies just because you tell him to. Everyone needs an outlet from all the stressful things that are happening in their lives, and it would be unfair to ask your boyfriend to give up something he enjoys doing just because you find it annoying.
Here are some things a girl can do to help maintain balance in a relationship without having to ask her boyfriend to sacrifice too much.
- Some women try to get into what their boyfriends are into just to be able to spend some quality time with their man. Having an open mind and being open to trying new things is considered a turn-on for most men, so this would actually hit two birds with one stone. This is also a good thing, especially if your boyfriend’s hobby is something productive and healthy like long-distance running. You can help him prepare for a marathon and get fit in the process.
- Another way to deal with this issue is to find your own hobby. If you’re busy scrapbooking or working out at the gym, you wouldn’t really mind your boyfriend spending the whole afternoon watching anime. Spending some time apart is a good thing. Give him a chance to miss you, and maybe he’ll cut down on the time he spends on his hobbies to find time to be with you.
- If you really can’t find a way to enjoy what he likes to do or if he just spends way too much time on his hobbies that he forgets you exist, you may have to sit down and discuss things. Learning how to compromise is very important for a relationship to succeed, so couples should really try hard to find some common ground to work with.
- Find a common hobby you could do together aside from your individual activities, or if you can’t find any common interests, agree on a particular day or days of the week when both of you shouldn’t have anything else scheduled and just stay in to watch a movie or go out on a date. This way, you and your boyfriend have something to look forward to every week. [Read – 23 Fun and Cute Things To Do With Your Boyfriend]
In the end, it is possible to love a guy, but hate his hobbies. It all boils down to how much you and your boyfriend are willing to sacrifice for the sake of the relationship. If one or both of you are willing to compromise, then you may want to make things easier for both of you and end the relationship.
Unless both of you are willing to put in the work, you’re better off finding someone who enjoys doing the same things that you do.
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